(1) Don’t post vague announcements on Facebook. My daughter will not be that person.
(2) Don’t bite your nails.
(3) Don’t pick your cuticles.
(4) Just leave your damn fingers alone. Trust me, it’s a habit too hard to be broken.
(5) If you have a dream about drinking a lot of water (more specifically from an outdoor garden hose) it’s because you drank too much.
(6) Don’t drink too much too often, college is okay. But after that things get messy.
(7) Clear the timer on the microwave when you’re done. No one like thats asshole who leaves time up.
(8) Know how to change a tire. So then you can teach me…
(9) A fridge shelf/drawer won’t clean itself. Then again in your time it might. You’re lucky. Cleaning the fridge is the worst.
(10) It’s okay to feed stray cats, but don’t let them sleep…
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